These Skills are Anything but Soft

I hear it all the time – people with good intentions encourage others to focus on their soft skills to help them navigate their professional and personal lives. This language makes me crazy because it inherently diminishes the value and power of these skills by claiming they’re “soft.”

The term was originally coined by the US Military in the 1960s to signify any skill that didn’t involve machinery or technology. To their credit, military officials realized that most of the skills needed to lead and motivate teams weren’t considered or understood, even though they relied on those skills to win battles. Soft skills first came into formal use in the early 70s, appearing in an Army training manual, though most of the early framing and language still heavily valued hard skills and claimed soft skills were unknowable.

The late 60s/early 70s were a dramatically different time and we think about activating value differently today. Yet, this relic of language persists, subtly dismissing the true impact that these skills have in the world.

Many people have begun to reframe soft skills as power skills, and even the most traditional organizations know they need to tap into more than just technical expertise to get their teams to succeed. But just how important are our power skills and why do we still feel the need to make them “different” from our other skills?

The World Economic Forum, no stranger to quantitative data, released its 2025 Future of Jobs report back in January, looking at the drivers that will shape the global labor market in the next 5 years. In the report, they extrapolate how those trends will impact employment and identify the core skills that employers need both right now and for future growth. Take a peek at their top 10 for 2025:

• Analytical thinking

• Resilience, flexibility, and agility

• Leadership and social influence

• Creative thinking

• Motivation and self-awareness

• Technological literacy

• Empathy and active listening

• Curiosity and lifelong learning

• Talent management

• Service orientation and customer service

Notice anything?

I was immediately struck by the fact that WEF doesn’t differentiate between power skills and technical skills and simply provide their ranking based on responses to thousands of employer surveys from 55 countries across all continents. All but one of these top ten skills could be traditionally considered “soft,” yet these are the exact skills that employers are looking for right now.

AI/Big Data comes in just outside of the top ten, and there are certainly other technical skills like Design and User Experience (#18) and Programming (#23) to round out the top 26 identified skills. But the majority fall into the categories of engaging with other people and the personal competencies needed to be a more effective connector.

As the report appropriately sums up: “This combination of cognitive, self-efficacy and interpersonal skills within the top five emphasizes the importance ascribed by respondents to having an agile, innovative and collaborative workforce, where both problem-solving abilities and personal resilience are critical for success…. workers must balance hard and soft skills to thrive in today’s work environments.”

As AI continues to enable us to systematize and routinize our more technically challenging tasks, people need to flex into other areas and particularly strengthen their human-centric skills to succeed. While there will always be a need for technical expertise and physical labor, the reality is that those tasks are becoming more automated and will require less specific knowledge or mastery moving forward. The great news is that humans are being freed up to focus on the things that matter and can drive bigger impact. The flip side, of course, is that many people don’t have the ability to engage others to foster that collaborative environment.

So why do we still think of these skills as something “other?”

Humans are much more comfortable focusing on things that are tangible and knowable. (Remember, the army understood the importance of soft skills but dismissed much of the research as “unknowable.”) Even those of us who are comfortable with ambiguity can default to measurable goals or clearly defined tasks. Our systems and structures reinforce this idea. Schools teach based on rubrics and metrics that have been decided by a school board or superintendent. Workplaces talk a big game and say they want their employees to growth in a more well-rounded way, yet their annual performance reviews tend to focus on the tactical and linear aspects of a job because they are most easily measured.

Personal competencies and development can be subjective which makes it harder for our brains to categorize or quantify what success looks like. Connecting with others, for example, is a highly specialized skill that requires adaptability to different environments, cultures, and contexts. How you engage your colleagues in a company on Wall Street may be entirely different than engaging people at a global nonprofit. We all know when connecting with someone just feels right, but can struggle to put a finger on exactly what we define as “right.”

And yet, as I’ve proven over the last year of running The Connectors, there are some basic underlying principles that don’t change, no matter the context. These are skills that can be learned, and I’ve been fortunate to watch so many people grow by helping them shift their mindsets, language, and approach to engaging others. The fundamentals of connection are the same and include many of the skills on the WEF list, like a curiosity mindset, empathy, and self-awareness.

Now, more than ever, we need to focus on our humanity to succeed – whether in the workplace or anywhere else in our lives. We need to be more comfortable with the ambiguity of a seemingly subjective skill and realize that personal development (and personal accountability) is just as important as any functional competency. Tapping into these skills will help you forge better pathways with others, leading to greater opportunities and outcomes with your colleagues, community, and beyond.

Just don’t call them soft.

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If you want to develop your leadership and connecting skills, check out our open enrollment workshops or learn more about our individual and group coaching opportunities. Or send an email to hello@theconnectors.net to get a conversation started with me.